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Archive for November, 2007

Plants for Hillary 2008

It takes a villageThe college student who says she was told what question to ask at one of Sen. Hillary Clinton’s campaign events told CNN Monday that she wasn’t the only one at the event who was a plant and said “voters have the right to know what really happened.” Continue Reading »

Woman has 200 climaxes per day

200 per daySARAH Carmen, 24, says the Permanent Sexual Arousal Syndrome that she suffers from can cause her to have climaxes at any time of day. She explained: “Anything can set me off. Even the hairdryers cause funny pulsations through my body. Continue Reading »

Four flags commit flagiscide at Hillary Clinton speech

Flag FlopsIt might not be her Waterloo but Hillary Clinton had her first major blooper this weekend, but Bob Dole and Gerald Ford never got over their public falls. Perhaps inspired by the swift boats for Kerry four flags keeled over at a Clinton speech, to her credit she tried to pick up the flags as they fell, but it was retarded moment none the less. Continue Reading »

Car maker to begin producing car made just for Muslims – the Muslim Mobile

Muslim MobileProton the Malaysian car maker is set to begin production of a car built specifically for Muslims. The car will come complete with a compass to indicate the direction of Mecca for prayers and a compartment to house the Koran and prayer scarves, not sure if this will be in addition to or just a clever marketing term for the glove compartment. Continue Reading »

Bottled kosher ham – the perfect holday treat

Holliday BottlesWhat says politically correct non-secular winter holiday more than a refreshing glass of kosher ham soda? The cool soday company Jones soda of Washington is unleashing this tasty beverage concoction for this upcoming holiday season. I suppose looking for reindeer blood cherry cola would be too over the top, but kosher ham is still really cool and offensive enough for me to order a few bottles.
Continue Reading »

Jesus found in suitcase

Jesus suitcaseJesus has been found in grilled cheese sandwiches, rust stains and all manners of unusual places – recently he was found hiding in a suitcase when the driver was been detained by Customs and Border Protection officers after a failed smuggling attempt. This would explain why so many Mexicans are Catholic, and cross the border. I mean for his sake if even he’s crossing the border illegally there has to be something really, really wrong going on down there. Continue Reading »

Aqua Dots thinning the herd

warningOnce upon a time there was a teenager who had outgrown all toys and thought things purchased in the children’s department or toy stores was beneath them. Then came China with their wonderful manufacturing techniques, low wages, oppressive government, ill-will towards the United States, and patent disregard for workplace safety and environmental policies that would make Dick Chaney feel squeamish.. This is where the story begins but definitely not where it will end. Continue Reading »

If Evil Knievel was a drunk semi retarded college student

drunk retardSome things in life are totally senseless in life children suffering, labels on electric devices warning not to place in water, and anything starring Paulie Shore. Fortunately there are the brave among us willing to take any risk, reach for the stars, thrill a crowd or simply ride a bicycle into a fence. Not sure if this guy was brave or simply retarded either way he is entertaining and is currently being offered a position as official rzone stunt man. Continue Reading »

10 commandments of the mob discovered

Mob CommandmentsPolice in Italy recently arrested one of the biggest leader s in the mob and made a surprising discovery. Salvatore Lo Piccolo carried a brown leather briefcase with a collection of papers, and among them were found the 10 commandments of the mob. Interestingly not all of the commandments given to Moses were altogether missing from the mob commandments, and you guessed it there was nothing about about abstaining from murdering or death in there. Continue Reading »

Husband tells wife no more sex until you want it – still waiting after 8 yrs

Camel enduranceGetting into a I can go longer than you contest with women over sex is like getting into a thirst contest with a camel. There is no way short of castration that you can win this battle, it’s like your high school football team calling out the New England Patriots. You would have a better chance suiting up with a trash can lid and a toilet plunger then setting out to do battle with big rigs on the freeway. Continue Reading »

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