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Worst hotel in the world: Big Apple Metro Hotel in Woking

Most popular suicide destinations The Metro Hotel in Surrey England has won the prestigious World Hotel Review Association’s award for "Worst Hotel in the World" for 2008. With just under one hundred thousand hotels in the world the Big Apple property had to go out of it’s way to earn that title so read how they were able to do it…

100 meterFree Lice

The hotel is offering a year long promotion – free head lice with every stay! For those who can’t keep a pet in their apartment you can take home an entire head full of these cute little guys.

Guaranteed Urban OlympicsWeight Loss

Looking to lose a few pounds? The Metro Hotel in Surrey is featuring free e. coli, salmonella and botulism. with every meal. A single helping of eggs can give you a weeks diarrhea and shed a dozen or more pounds in a week! Perfect for getting ready to fit into that wedding dress.

Urban OlympicsFree Registry

All rooms feature child porn so staying at the hotel will earn you automatic registry as a sex offender.

Urban OlympicsIt’s Haunted

The Metro Hotel features a menagerie of spooks, ghosts and other spectral manifestations. It’s just like poltergeist only real – actual photos of ghosts at the Metro.

Urban OlympicsPay in Pounds

This hotel only accepts pounds – not the British pound, you actually have to pay in pounds of human flesh. On the bright side a week’s stay can cost you two full dress sizes.

Urban OlympicsLow Prices

The Metro Hotel was built on a toxic waste dump that no-one in Surrey wanted to build on. We bought the land for pennies – and are passing the savings on to you!

Urban OlympicsDead Hookers

Once a year we find a dead hooker and hide him, her or hemale underneath one of our mattresses. If you find one under your pillow get a free nights stay!

Urban OlympicsHigh Security

All of our beds, bathrooms and hallways feature hidden cameras so you’re always safe at this hotel. If you go to the bathroom – we’re watching you and so are our web subscribers so you’re always under our watchful eyes.

Urban OlympicsAcoustic Walls

Our walls are not just paper thin – but are actually designed to amplify sound from the room next door. If your neighbor gets lucky he won’t be the only one enjoying it!

Urban OlympicsNo Soldiers

Our hotel has a no-soldier policy so you won’t have to feel bad about having never served in the military. If you are a hero and have served, simply lie about it and if we can’t guess you get in.

Contact Us!

Urban OlympicsTelephone:
01483 727100

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Big Apple Woking
Crown Square
Surrey, GU21 6HR

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The 2008 World Hotel Review Association Award

Urban Olympics

Why We are the Worst

Corporal Tomos Stringer was told by staff at Metro Hotel, in Woking, that it was company policy not to accept members of the armed forces as guests. The 24-year-old had traveled to the Surrey town to help with funeral preparations for a friend killed in action.

It was so late that Cpl Stringer, who had broken his wrist jumping off an Army truck as it was attacked, had no choice but to bed down in his tiny, two-door car, arm covered in plaster.

Cpl Stringer, of 13 Air Assault Support Regiment, The Royal Logistic Corps, has now returned to Afghanistan, but his mother, Gaynor Stringer, from Criccieth, north Wales, told The Times that she is still furious about the incident.
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“I’m very, very angry. It’s discrimination. They would never get away with it if it was against someone of ethnic origin,” she said.

She said they had received neither an apology nor an explanation from the hotel, which is part of a family entertainment centre called The Big Apple and owned by a company called American Amusements.

Hywel Williams, the MP for Caernarfon, Derek Twigg, the Defence Minister, and Bob Ainsworth, the Armed Forces Minister, have written to the hotel.

Mr Twigg wrote: “Although I do not know the precise circumstances, I think it is deplorable for the management of a hotel to have a policy not to accept military personnel and that this case is especially egregious given that the individual concerned was on injury leave from Afghanistan.”

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Posted By: Jerome Aronson

News Category: Retarded, Review


8 Responses to “Worst hotel in the world: Big Apple Metro Hotel in Woking”

  1. I live in Atlanta, GA, USA. I must say that this is the most unheard of incident I have ever read. You mean to tell me that there is discrimination against soldiers in UK Hotels? That’s a bit like telling African Americans that they canno thave a room.

    It’s wrong. THe UK Government should lock the ddors of that place, and charge the recepptionist with a hate crime.

    Philip E on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:28 pm
  2. I CANNOT stand what was done to that soldier.

    Jerome on 17 Sep 2008 at 12:21 am
  3. Someone should shut that place down. Not just for being disgusting, but for being idiots and discriminating against soldiers. I’m with Philip E on what should be done.
    Big Apple my A**! They are NOTHING like the Americans from NY who had to suffer at the hands of idiots.

    Susan B. on 30 Sep 2008 at 12:36 pm
  4. I stayed at the Woking Metro Hotel a few weeks ago. I found that there was excellent service, the rooms were great and reasonably priced (the dead hookers didn’t smell much).
    The best thing about it was the lack of military personnel, which has ruined my stay at other hotels.

    Peace out.

    Raz on 11 Oct 2008 at 6:45 am
  5. I used to live in Woking and know that this hotel sits in a mostly Muslim area, perhaps this is the real reason as the management have been quoted in the press saying they have no such policy… I was also once set upon by a gang of Asians with belts for sticking up for a girl being beaten up, it was quite clearly a planned attack.

    James on 23 Oct 2008 at 6:43 am
  6. The soldier was not turned away because he was a soldier but because they do not accept soldier ID. You need a passport to stay in the hotel. ACTUALLY. And it’s a rather nice hotel.

    Sarah on 02 Jun 2009 at 7:05 am
  7. The whole soldier thing is crap he needed a passport to stay thats all like everyone else does so it’s got nothing to do with him being a soldier!!! Soldiers always visit The Big Apple for the day and come back all the time!

    Sophie on 02 Jun 2009 at 7:08 am
  8. i stayed at this hotel recently and was given a good old raping it was so good to finally be raped again theres not many hotels that offer this service im so glad that there are still some traditional hotels in england cheers p.s my arsehole is bruitally torn

    Soil richards on 12 May 2010 at 2:54 am

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