Using the STD rating system which accounts for severity of disease, likelyhood of infection, wealth and looks (see Figure-8 below the list) Jessica is the most desirable disease riddled starlet.

Her disease was apparently given to her by Derek Jeter. A former employee of her ex-boyfriend Cash Warren used to go out on runs and refill her Valtrex prescription on a regular basis

Reportedly Kritanna passed the gift that keeps giving it to her boyfriend, Justin Whalin. Her most memorable role was as the female terminator in Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. Being a converted fashion model the less she speaks the better when acting.

Loken stated in an interview with Curve magazine, "I have dated and have had sex with men and women and have to say that the relationships I have had with certain women have been much more fulfilling, sexually and emotionally, than of those with certain men… I connect with an aura, with energy. And if the person with whom I connect happens to be a female, that’s just the way it is. That’s what makes my wheels turn."

Pamela Anderson is making strong progress in her battle against Hepatitis C – her doctor has declared her fitter and healthier at 40 than she’s ever been in her life. In 2003, Anderson claimed she was not expected to live for more than 10 or 15 years after contracting the disease from ex-husband Tommy Lee – but last October the former Baywatch star announced her determination to defy all odds and cure the virus completely.

Her numbers would be higher, but her looks are on the downhill slope and she can’t rely on her acting skills to pay her phone bill.

Victoria Beckham the former Spice Girl turned freakish alien example of plastic surgery gone too far (ala Michael Jackson) would be the wealthiest on this list if her and her husband didn’t manage money like Fannie Mae. The poster couple for nouveau riche jet sets around the world buying up orchards and reportedly Victoria aka "Poche Spice" sports a seven million dollar ring.

Victoria probably picked up the Herp from one of her husband’s thousand plus groupie count.

Paris neglected to pay off her bills for a storage unit and her belongings were auctioned off. Thanks once again to that storage locker which held more secrets than the chest in Raiders of the Lost Ark, a medical record/prescription info insert emerged for a drug called Valtrex, which is used to treat outbreaks of genital herpes.

The troubled celebutante, sort of actress, sort of singer was formerlly a professional heiress was but written out of the will for her crazy antics. That cost her more than fifty million dollars and at least two spots on this list.

This former child model went on to become a late-teen Disney movie star to wild party girl with not much of an acting future. By all accounts she has given up men and is set to marry Samantha Ronson within a year.

Prior to switching teams Lohan went through more male actors than a catering truck. She has recently taken a break from acting to drive under the influence and get back her girlish figure in rehab centers.

Her career has tapered off since two succesful TV shows (Charmed and Who’s The Boss) and her career is mostly limited to B Movies and the Sci-Fi Channel.

She is sweet, loves sports and visits the troops so with her good looks you could probably put up with the odd flare up.

Britney’s well telivised downward spiral has led her to wake up in more than one strange bed after a drug filled evening of partying. This former member of the Mickey Mouse Club even kissed Madonna on the lips, and that’s roughly equivelent to locking lips with a half dozen Bangkok prostitutes. She has been doucmented buying Zovirax in Kentwood.

The head shaving, well publicised drug problems, losing her children to Kevin Federline and massive weight gain have all taken their toll on her career and more importantly her cash supplies.

Janet Jackson had a list of her perscriptons leaked online. Here is a link from smoking gun with her actual perscription for Zovirax (an antiviral drug, a synthetic nucleoside analogue, that is active against the herpes viruses,)

She has the highest wealth on the list but looks too much like her child fondling brother Michael to score too high on this list. Besides at 42 she is one of the oldest on this list and is prone to massive (Oprah-esque) weight gains.

Katie seems like a nice enough child bride in the happy Scientology family. She would rank higher in wealth, but signed a $40 million dollar prenuptual agreement with Tom Cruise. I think for $40 million I would let the man nearly twice her age slobber all over me and give me herpes.