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Pamela Anderson obituary: 1967-2038

Pamela Anderson Obituary Pamela Denise Anderson: 1967-2038 was remembered as the pin-up girl for the late 20th Century. Her career began and essentially ended with her Playboy pictorials beginning in 1989 with a controversial spread she did in 2027 serving as bookends in her professional life.

2038 – Dies of Implant Infection

Pamela AndersonOn September 29th 2038 Pamela Anderson, 71 died at Arnold Schwarzenegger
Memorial Hospital in Riverside California. Memorial services in Hollywood drew huge crowds that were estimated to be over 70 thousand people a week later. The event was a huge phenomenon covered on all both remaining TV networks for days. Pamela was hugely popular in China were her iconic image survived her career meltdown in the late 2020’s.

She is survived by her two sons Dylan Jagger Lee 42 and Brandon Thomas Lee 40.

2031 – Withdraws from Public

Pamela Anderson

Pamela became a recluse after her failed marriage to Donald Trump and the infamous Tommy & Pamela Uncensored 2 tape.Her aging appearance became a punch line for comedians. She was rear ely seen in public and her photo was one of the most elusive targets for celebrity chasing Paparazzi. She kept to herself and family although still remained active to her favorite cause PETA. She would occasionally to voice-over’s for commercials with her trademark sultry voice although mostly for products targeting aging baby-boomers.

2029 – Launches Line of Sexy Adult Diapers

Pamela Anderson

Pamela’s money woes led her to look into marketing your brand image and she was known to license anyone willing to pay her money to use her name. Perhaps the most famous was a sexy adult line of diapers targeting incontinent baby boomers. The product was actually a moderate success and helped her pay off her legal bills and provided much needed retirement income.

2029 -The Trump Marriage

Pamela Anderson

Pamela briefly married Donald Trump for seven months prior to his death at age 84. The 83 year old entrepreneurial icon was suffering from colon cancer and many felt he his mental faculties were in decline. His children from previous marriages accused pamela of taking advantage of the frail Donald and a string of lawsuits over his estate went on for years.

Like Anna Nicole Smith Pamela another Playmate who married a wealthy geriatric man Pamela never received the millions she may have been looking for. Legal fees actually outstripped her modest settlement and the entire affair was a major drain on her assets.

2028 – Pamela & Tommy Sex Tape – The Sequel
Pamela AndersonOn the heels of her famous final Playboy pictorial Pamela released home movies of herself and an aging Tommy Lee engaged in things you wouldn’t normally expect to see a 61 year old doing. The video had a certain niche and did sell well with older people who had grown up with Pamela and were old themselves. As usual weird things like this sell well in Asia and many think the video led to her dating Donald Trump the following year. Sadly, Tommy Lee who Pamela referred to as the love of her life died the same year of complications from Hepatitis that many believe he gave to her decades before.

2027 – Infamous 60-year-old Playboy Pictorial

Pamela Anderson

Pamela’s final appearance in Playboy holds the dubious distinction of being the worst selling issue of the magazine’s nearly more than 75 year history.

After a long string of more than 25 appearances her final pictorial was probably one too many. The flabby and out of shape 60 year-old Pamela was a marketing disaster for the struggling magazine.
One of the final magazines in print the historic magazine ceases printing only months later. Many blame the demise squarely on this issue which attracted some older subscribers sickened those under 55.

 

2018 – Oscar Nomination

Pamela Anderson

In a rare acting appearance Pamela starred as Pheobe Skyler an aging rock star coming to terms with her career in decline and losing her looks. Many felt the independent film role was semiautomatic and the
performance seemed genuine. Many considered the movie "Forgotten Yesterdays" to be the high point of her professional acting career. She went on to be nominated for an Oscar for best actress and a Golden Globe nomination.

Following the part she followed up with several smaller roles in film and television but never received the acclaim or attention she achieved in her 2018 hit.

 

2013 – Plastic Surgery Setbacks

Pamela Anderson

In 2013 Pamela launched her latest "new look" many were not ready for a surgically altered 50 year old woman as a sex symbol. The Playboy pictorial met mixed reviews and her TV show "Deadly Cougar" was a ratings disaster and only two episodes were aired on CBS.

2008 – The Looks Begin to Go

Pamela Anderson

Many experts consider 2008
to be the end of Pamela’s attractive phase. At 40 her age and repeated attempts at
improving her looks combined to result in a freakish appearance that many would refer to as

 

1998 – V.I.P. and Career Decline
Pamela AndersonIn September 1998, Anderson starred in her produced series V.I.P. It was very poorly received and a critical bomb. However, with many people tuning in just to see her, the show lasted four seasons before being canceled in 2002. Anderson stated that she needed to dedicate her time to raising her children, but many believed that she was retiring.

In April 2005, Anderson starred in a new FOX sitcom Stacked as Skyler Dayton, a party girl (with implants), who goes to work at a bookstore. It was canceled on May 18, 2006, after two seasons, although some episodes had not been aired on the network.

1998 – The Original Pamela & Tommy Sex Tape
Pamela AndersonA pornographic home video of Anderson and Tommy Lee on their honeymoon was stolen from their home, and made a huge stir on the Internet. Anderson sued the Internet Entertainment Group, the company that was distributing the video. Ultimately the courts awarded Anderson and Lee $1.5 million plus attorney fees for their share of the profits. After this, the company sold copies of the stolen honeymoon tape across the country. It was very popular.

1996 – Barbed Wire
Pamela AndersonIn 1996, she appeared in a feature film, Barb Wire, as a character known as Barbara Rose Kopetski, which was mistakenly thought by some to have been her real name. The movie, a thinly-veiled futuristic remake of Casablanca, failed to achieve commercial success. During the filming of Barb Wire, Anderson suffered a miscarriage.

The film bombed commercially and critically. At the 1997 Razzie Awards, Anderson ‘won’ for Worst New Star. The movie was also nominated for Worst Actress, Anderson, Worst Original Song, ‘Welcome to Planet Boom’ by Tommy Lee, Worst Picture, Worst Screen Couple, for Anderson’s ‘impressive enhancements’ and Worst Screenplay.

1993 – Baywatch

Pamela Anderson

In 1993 Pamela landed the role of C. J. Parker on Baywatch. Anderson was still modeling for Outdoor Life and appearing on the cover of the magazine each year. Her role as C.J. Parker gave her more popularity and gained her attention from international viewers. She returned to Baywatch for the 2003 reunion movie, Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding. She also made appearances on The Nanny as Fran’s rival, Heather Biblow.

 

1991 – Original "Tool Time" Girl

Pamela Anderson

After her move to Los Angeles, Anderson bleached her brunette hair blonde. In 1991, she landed a minor role as the original "Tool Time girl" on the hit television sitcom, Home Improvement. She left the show after two seasons

 

1989 – First Playboy Appearance

Pamela Anderson

In late 1989, Anderson decided to model for Playboy magazine. She first appeared as their October 1989 cover girl. At this stage in her modeling career she had decided to live in Los Angeles to further pursue her career ambitions. She became a centerfold for Playboy when the magazine chose her to be their Playmate of the Month for their February 1990 issue. Anderson has since appeared in Playboy several times in the 1990s and the following decade.

 

1985 – Early Career

Pamela Anderson

After graduating from Highland Secondary School in 1985, Anderson moved to Vancouver and worked as a fitness instructor. During the summer of 1989, Anderson went with her friends to a BC Lions game at BC Place; at some point during the game she was shown on the stadium screen wearing a Labatt’s t-shirt, causing the crowd to cheer for the 21-year-old Anderson. She was taken down to the field to get an ovation from the crowd. Labatt’s immediately offered Anderson a modeling contract and she accepted.

 

1967 – Born July 1st in Canada

Pamela Anderson

Pamela Denise Anderson was born at 4:08am, July 1, 1967 in Ladysmith, British Columbia, Canada. 1967 was Canada’s Centennial year and Pamela was the first baby born this day in all of Canada earning her the title "The Centennial Baby". This earned her an article in the local newspaper, the Ladysmith-Chemainus Chronicle. The Anderson’s received cash prizes and awards for having the first baby born in Canada on this day, Canada’s 100th Birthday. "That’s where it all started" says Pamela.

Shortly after that, her parents Barry, a furnace repairman and Carol, a waitress, moved to Comox, British Columbia where they purchased a large six bedroom house on Douglas Street. Comox is about 200 kilometers north of Vancouver, British Columbia and it was there one day in a library that Pamela’s modeling career would start. Pamela was sitting listening to a story with about one hundred other children when a photographer captured a picture of her that won the hearts of all that saw viewed it. It was quickly copyrighted and placed in all the libraries in British Columbia

 

The family has requested that anyone wishing to send send flowers for her passing instead make a charitable donation to her favorite cause PETA.

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Posted By: Jerome Aronson

News Category: Celebrity, News, Retarded

 

2 Responses to “Pamela Anderson obituary: 1967-2038”

  1. I like Pamela Anderson . I like her movie vip . which ever outfit she wears she looks very sexy in the dress. That’s the kind of girl I will keep

    Maximo Pies on 06 Oct 2010 at 7:19 am
  2. Oh my gosh… This was hilarious.

    Anna on 26 Oct 2010 at 8:30 am
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