Status messages are a little window into your world, telling people hey you aren’t that bad be my friend. Fortunately for you we’ve compiled a list of status messages that will cull the politically correct, overly sensitive and humorless from your friends list….
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| Hold on, I need two more minutes of alone time with your profile picture. |
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1 |
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| True love is bound by no restraining order. |
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2 |
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| Support gay marriage: it subtracts two men who like to shop, talk and dress nice that I don’t have to compete with for chicks. |
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3 |
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| Could you please turn the lights up, I have hacked your webcam but the lighting is terrible in your room? |
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4 |
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| According to Wikipedia I’m dead. |
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5 |
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| Babysitting my niece, and have quick question – five years old should be ok to watch faces of death right? |
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6 |
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| You’ll be seeing me on all the news channels soon. |
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7 |
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| Women are like bananas, they both smell terrible when you peel their skin off and leave them lying around. |
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8 |
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| Needs to know how to get blood stains and DNA evidence out of carpet ASAP |
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9 |
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| Now that Obama is elected can I quit being nice to black people I don’t like? |
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10 |
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| Anyone else having at least six month allergic reaction to laundry detergent on their private parts? |
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BONUS |
Carbon neutral pledge: