Which cartoon characters are gay?
Which cartoon characters are the most likely to be closeted homosexuals? Lets out the ten most likely gays using our own cartoon gaydar with a plus or minus 30% gay accuracy rating.
| Waylon Smithers | ||
|
Waylon Smithers whose closeted sexual orientation has been characterized by the writers of the show as "Burns-sexual" which is where men are apparently attracted to men of nursing home age. TV Show: The Simpsons |
1 | |
| Stewie Griffin | ||
|
Stewie Griffith has all of the classic signs or symptoms of being gay except he really doesn’t like his mother. Stewie is breaking ground as the first gay infant on television. |
2 | |
| Tinky-Winky Teletubby | ||
|
Tinky Winky who has a triangle on his head, acts effeminately and carries a purse has been accused of trying to turn children gay by the far right for nearly a decade. |
3 | |
| Sebastian the Crab | ||
|
Horatio Thelonious Ignacious Crustaceous Sebastian may not have come out of his shell yet but he’s definitely stuffing boy crabs. |
4 | |
| Spongebob Squarepants | ||
|
Spongebob is a soft asexual, anti-masculine figure who lives in a pineapple in an undersea locale called Bikini Bottom. His best friends are an ebullient pink starfish named Patrick. and a Squid who enjoys bubble baths and classical music and talks like Paul Lynde. SpongeBob and Patrick are occasionally seen holding hands. As an article on the Gay Financial Network’s website puts it, ”You do the math, folks.” |
5 | |
| Hefty, Handy, Clumsy, Brainy & Vanity Smurf | ||
|
Hefty, Handy and Vanity are gay archetypes. Vanity is the kind of gay archetype commonly presented by the straight entertainment industry, while Hefty and Handy are gay archetypes in the same vein as the Village People, with their extremely iconic masculinity, exaggerated to the point of camp. Meanwhile, I believe Clumsy and Brainy represent an stereotypical gay couple. Besides 100 males with only one woman would have to go gay unless the woman was Madonna. |
6 | |
| Timon & Pumbaa | ||
|
Timon & Pumbaa are always on the lookout for a good worm to stick in their mouths. Not just Disney’s first gay couple they were also the first gay couple to adopt and raise Simba the Lion King. |
7 | |
| Peppermint Patty | ||
|
Peppermint Patty had a deep, gravelly voice. Wears pants, not dresses like the other Peanuts gals. Plays a mean game of football, and even picked on boys. She always hung out with that androgynous Marcie who calls her "sir" and she always wears comfortable shoes. |
8 | |
| Bert & Ernie | ||
| Bert & Ernie two single men who live together, take baths together and sleep in the same bed have to be gay. TV Show: Sesame Street  |
9 | |
| Velma Dinkley | ||
|
Velma Dinkley always tries to cuddle up next to Daphne in the Mystery Machine. She sported a butch Pete Rose haircut. Has broad shoulders and wears thick turtleneck-sweaters and knee socks. Never once shagged Shaggy.
|
10 | |
23 Responses to “Which cartoon characters are gay?”
|
|
Carbon neutral pledge:
Speaking of retard zone. If you are going to make fun of a cartoon character get the name right! It’s Stewie Griffin, not Griffith.
Actually if you want to be totally accurate in episode 13 of season 11 (not yet aired) he does get married (in a gay non religious ceremony) to Archie Griffin and changes his name to Griffin.
Snagglepus is definitely takes it in the backside.
handy smurf is not gay he falls in love with a mermaid and clumsy has a crush on a pixie
Casper the Friendly Ghost seemed a little on the gay side.
Childhood memories…
Yeah, gay ass bitches! If I was a cartoon I would rape smurfet, for shures.
well shera was a lesbo and all her gay friends a mermaid, girls who had wings, and stuff and the only duded wore a heart on his chest and his best friend was a talking owl and scorpia was butch and catra was too anf imp anmd lookee were gay the majority of those characters were voiced by erica scheimer who was a lesbian herself.
TRANSFORMERS, ROBOTS IN DISGUISE..OR IS IT TRANSSEXUALS, HOMO’S IN DISGUISE, Those Teletubbys are hermaphrodites, I know, they got my ass in a dream. They were all wearing black PVC and had whips. You see, there is subliminal suggestions in the show. Scooby Doo is great, we all want to bang thelma. Actually Scoobys quite sexy too. Dave From Derby
I am ****ing sick of everything in this world and vacantly silly comments from idiots who only have one brain cell between them.
When is superman coming to save us and Aliens landing and free electricity from cold fusion reactors or BLACK MATTER REACTORS. !!! BOLLOCKS..
None Terrestrial Intelligence life forms are living around my ass hole.
****ing cartoons have made us unstable.
What about Fanboy and Chum Chum and Chowder?
[…] http://retardzone.com/2009/05/28/which-cartoon-characters-are-gay/ […]
LA VERGA PERROS PUTOS OMOSEXUALES SIN H, TODOS SON GEIS OLA DE MAR POR PUTOS!
When I was a kid back then, I considered both Snoopy and Woody the first gayest animal duo in animated history, Wrong people think no, Snoopy wasn’t gay with Woodstock they say Snoopy is straight. Right people do find Snoopy gay with Woodstock because they both love each other that’s the secret key of success that led a great influence to other gay animal duos like Timon and Pumbaa or others that would’ve follow, any questions?
What about HIM from PowerPull Girls
I always thought Tails, Gromit, Bart Simpson, Ash’s Pikachu, Silver The Hedgehog, Stitch, White Bomber, Yugi Moto and Riddle School’s Phil were gay.
Tails – Duh! It’s so obvious that he’s more in love with Sonic then Amy and Sally put together. If he isn’t then surely he’s been raped
Gromit – He does so many womanly things he has to be
Ash’s Pikachu – He is way too clingy to Ash
Silver – No one who acts, sounds and looks like him can go around saying thier straight
Stitch – First of all, he copy’s Lilo so often people think he’s a girl and secondly, he can turn into a ball so he probably sucks his d***
White Bomber – Have you seen what he wears? It’s like somekind of fetish
Yugi – No straight person walks around in tight leather clothes
Phil – He just seems like your everyday, school gay
Prince Adam from Eternia was probably the gayest cartoon character stereotype: He wore a pink shirt, talked like a pansy, was musclebound and totally ignored the big-boobed women who surrounded him!
The reason I think we should get to trick is the dumb beagle Snoopy my dad created by having him as a date between Snoopy and the Red Baron for dinner so as long as they can kiss and have sex as make up for the both of them to love each other one way or another after all, sounds like a funny idea it would’ve make a good story finale and not a bad story finale!
BUGS BUNNY, HE MAN, SNAGGLEPUSS.
I tried looking at your site on my new iphone 4 and the layout does not seem to be correct. Might wa
Thanks for your concepts. Single thing really noticed is that banks along with financial institutions have in intellect the spending behavior of consumers plus be aware of that mainly nation be very successful away their valid belief cards roughly the getaways. They appropriately take lead of this specific fact and activate flooding your own inbox along with snail-mail box next to with hundreds of Zero APR credit cards offers emphatically subsequent to the holiday time concludes. Knowing
Howdy! I just would like to give an enormous thumbs up for the good data you’ve here on this post. I will likely be coming again to your weblog soon.
Selected Sections Corporate and Partnership Income Tax Code and Regulations, 2013-2014
This set of selected statutes and regulations offers maximum flexibility and ease of use for law school courses in corporate, partnership, and business enterprise taxation. The 2013-2014 Edition takes into account recent legislative and regulatory deve…